Aleksy Altercation.

I’m blatantly stealing that phrase from one of my teachers. Once classes began, nigh upon 3 weeks ago, that was the first thing that dropped out of his mouth. He’s a bit strange, but very amusing. Anyway, he put a foot on a nearby chair, assumed the Captain Morgan stance, and proclaimed with an air of Shakespeare that it would behoove us to consider doubling or even tripling our vitamin C intake. I heeded his warning. For a couple days I made it a habit to drink my weight in Orange Juice. Oh Orange juice. What love hath thee bore for me? For thou hath bestowed none of thine’s properties upon mine body. Oh! What ill will doth thou harbor! And for what reason should the purity of my soul! My soul, Sir! Be tainted by filth!

That’s the cold medicine talking.

Between bouts of sneezing I’ve been pondering this whole…*waves arms around*….thingy.  Being in a building, in very close proximity to other people, begs the question: What am I inhaling? What spores lurk, invisible, and suspended in the air? What infectious little devils float jubilantly, waiting for their next victim?

In the long run I reckon that’s a good thing. Sure, being sick downright sucks. If you’re completely ruined, that is. When you’re moderately sick, it’s only a matter of enjoying your day off and feeding off the sympathy of others. I kind of wonder what the impact of anti-bacterial products are. And vaccines. You watch. We’ll all be happy frolicking in the future, pumped full of anti this and preventative that. Then we’d be wiped out by a big, nasty, simple, borderline ironic bout of the common cold.

I imagine that it’s important to get sick every once in a while. Build up your immunity and all that happy crap. So here’s my advice. Go have a picnic on the bathroom floor. Not only will you be strengthening your immune system, but you’ll be reinforcing family values. And if you’ve got kids….well, you don’t really have to do anything. As you’re probably well aware, kids are germ magnets. When they walk down a hallway, or clutch a sink faucet, not only are they collecting a menagerie of evil little germs, but they’re also adding to the mix. Sharing is good, eh?